i don’t have much time left

“partly truth, partly fiction; a walking contradiction.”

i don’t have much time left

before my contradictory needs and dreams consume the burning torch of passion

and the words i say right now, unfiltered and uncensored

become the fatal imbroglio of words that please

words that spread like wildfire and are consumed by masses

that will stop thinking and use mine to ahead their agenda

which will become the blind men’s opinion & propaganda

i don’t have much time left

before i start writing to be read

and the ink blots that were loved and cherished feel cheated

the black and blue go on an endless task to make green

and i, consumed by my desires, become a sheep.

a sell out; both morally and financially.

people that know increase, but those that understand disappear

and my soul is sacrificed; hanged on a cross made of dollars

with pouring fantasies, and baring of my fabricated thoughts that are untrue

and set on fire by the machine matchstick that wants everything to be consumed

and men, women and children that had faith are coughing and choking on the smoke of mass consumption.

i know my fall; i have no assumptions.

i don’t have much time left.

when i am senile and my eye sight is weak

my soul would have weakened long before that.

and when i stand on the podium of life

igniting and setting fire to the stage of visibility

spread across all media of consumption.

smiling, waving, framing, feigning.

i know the smoke contains my values, reaching the sky and new heights but dead and gone.

i know i will have to go on.

i understand i am a cog in the wheel

the wheel will move and underneath it lies crushed a few people that could have been saved

but before i become that famous victim, i shall speak my mind, for what i feel now might change later

and my changed thoughts might not reach anyone; not even me.

sigh,

a last try.

i don’t have much time left.

Photo by lalesh aldarwish on Pexels.com

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